Monday, January 18, 2010


Today is the kind of day that my proverbial lotto winnings would be taking me to someplace warm. It doesn't need to be exotic, but sun would definitely be involved. When I was in college, I spent many a weekend in St. George escaping from the bitter cold and mounds of snow in Cedar City. That is the kind of escape I am wanting now. Sunshine, shopping, good food, a little relaxation. There is something about the sun shinning that makes everything seem alright. Feeling the sun on my back as I garden outside is God touching me and telling me I'm okay. The absence of sun does nothing more than spiral me into my own personal darkness. Today I wonder if indeed there is light at the end of the tunnel. I wonder if my decision to quit working was right. I wonder if any decision I ever made was right... I want to find the warmth in life. Neither light nor dark, but warm and welcoming. There are days when I am okay, when the sun shines and all is right in my world, but I don't know how to hang onto them. I don't know how to capture the warmth and make it last. Lotto winning and a margarita sound like good bet though!


  1. Warm, bright sun shining down would be perfection about now.

    i love reading your thoughts and words. you are a great writer. i, on the other hand, am a terrible commenter.

    I hope you find some sunshine today.

  2. I miss St. George. I loved it there. The first year we moved to Price from St. George, we had a long winter. So much snow. I agree with you and the sunshine. When it's not shining, my soul isn't either.